Fast Car - Fiction Friday
The clock on her car dash read 12:32 am. It was a red 1997 Pontiac Firebird and the clock was about the only reliable thing on the car. She bought it four years prior from a used car lot with the money she had saved while working at the local diner. She remembered that day, swearing it would be the last time anyone would see her in that small town. Yet here she was, at 12:33 am driving back to that same place she worked so hard to get out of.
It would be just about 3:00 am before she actually made it to her mom's house. The radio, which had been softly playing in the background, suddenly caught her attention. Fast Car by Tracy Chapman poured from her speakers, and it's like she had entered a different time. Images of her and the small-town boy in his old 69' Camaro with the windows down, the wind in her hair, filled her mind.
So remember we were driving, driving in your car
Speed so fast I felt like I was drunk
City lights lay out before us
And your arms felt nice wrapped ‘round my shoulders
I had a feeling that I belonged
I had a feeling I could be someone, be someone, be someone
Would he still be there, stuck in that same place doing the same thing? She hadn't heard from him since the day she left. As the memory of that night pushes itself to the front of her mind she grips the steering wheel tightly and rolls down the windows, willing the cool breeze to clear her mind. Instead, the cool air on the back of neck reminds her of the same chill she felt as she looked into his eyes that night. She felt the tears forming and now, at 1:00 am, there was not use trying to stop them. She couldn't stop herself from remembering.
"So you're just going to leave then? Like there's nothing here for you at all." He said. His words sounded like poison and she wanted to hate him.
"I can't be my mom. I can't be stuck in this toxic town where no one goes anywhere or does anything! Come with me!" She pleaded, taking his hands in hers. He pulled away.
"You know I can't."
"Because of your dad?" She could feel the stomach acid rising in her throat. It always came down to this.
"If I leave who will take care of him?"
"He will! When are you going to start living your life for you Gage?"
He didn't answer. They were standing in the parking lot of the diner she worked at, between his car and the one she just bought not even an hour before. She didn't know what she expected when she told him her plans.
Gage's dad was an alcoholic and since his mom and sister left when he was 13 he's been taking care of him and himself. They were 18 now and she was tired of him making excuses for his dad. They had talked about running away before, when they were 14 and then again when they were 16, when cage bought his Camaro. They spent so many nights driving as far as they possibly could before turning around and coming home.
Sydney had known since she was a little girl she wanted to be more than what this town could offer. She watched her mom struggle to raise her and her little sister by herself, and swore that would never be her. Falling in love with Gage wouldn't change that. She wanted him to come with her, but if he didn't, she would be okay.
"Why do you have to leave now Syd? What's different between now and a year from now?" He asked her.
"I could ask you the same thing Gage? Is your dad suddenly going to get better in a year? Are you going to feel any less responsible for him in a year?" She knew the answer just as much as Gage did. He wouldn't. "I'd be waiting.... for nothing." She paused. Looking at the old diner. "This can't be the rest of my life."
"Then I can't be the rest of your life." Gage's voice was suddenly cold, sending a chill down her spine.
She looked at him, searching his eyes for something, anything. "Gage..."
"Just go Sydney. Why are you even still standing here?" This was it.
"Don't be like that. Don't get mean and cold and distant. This doesn't have to be the end Gage." Her voice was shaking just as much as her hands as she reached for him.
"Yes, it does!" He yelled as he pushed her away. "I'm always going to be this small-town guy. I'm never going to be enough for you."
"Don't say that! You know that's not how I feel. It's not you, it's this town, this place..."
"I am this town Sydney!"
She could no longer control the tears she had been trying to hold back. He was right. This would be the end.
"Just go Sydney. I have to get to work and... Just go." Gage got into his car, and without even looking back, he drove off.
She did the same. It wasn't until she reached New York, some 5 hours later, that she finally stopped crying.
Lost in nostalgic reverie, Sydney hadn't realized how much time had passed. The clock now read 2:00 am. Just an hour until she would be back in town, back at her moms, and back in her old room.
Her little sister was getting married, and unlike Sydney, she had absolutely no desire to leave Stone Brook, Connecticut. Alison was only 2 years younger than Sydney, but had had her whole life planned since she 5. She would grow up and marry the most handsomest boy and have 5 little babies and make pies, she had said one day when they were playing house. Sydney rolled her eyes at the memory, the same way she rolled her eyes then when her sister told her then.
Sydney stopped at a red like. It was the intersection of Broad and Old Horse Rd, where the train tracks acted like a border between Stone Brook and Hollowgrove. She had made better time then she planned, now only 10 minutes from her mom's. The air smelled different in her old town, like pine trees and fresh cut grass. She had been living in Brooklyn for four years now and forgot what grass even smelled like. This may not be where she feels she belongs, but she couldn't deny it smelled like home.
Stone Brook was one of the smallest towns in Connecticut, so small you couldn't even find it on a map most times. It consisted of one main road, Broad Street, and four small cross roads, Old Horse Rd, Tavern Ln, Yorkshire Dr, and Hollow Way. The center of town had a gazebo with a park that sat right across from the church. There was one high school, one elementary school that consisted of grade k-8, and one diner. In fact, there was really only one of everything. If you didn't live here, you wouldn't believe it was real.
Sydney's mom lived on a small side street off of Tavern Ln, the street Gage's dad lived on. Before she could think about whether or not he still lived there, she saw it. Gage's yellow old beat up Camaro, parked right in the drive way. It's like it had never moved, like she had never left. Without realizing it, she had stopped in the middle of the street, right in front of his house. She stared at it, remembering all the times stood in front of the blue door waiting for gage to come out. Suddenly the porch light came on and the blue door opened. Stepping out on the porch, she didn't recognize him at first, but it was Gage. He looked right at her and as he stepped forward, she drove away.
He still lived there, she thought. He still lived there, and now he knows she's back.
When she reached her mom's she suddenly felt more tired than ever had. The house was quiet and instead of going up to her old room, she curled up on the couch, wrapping herself in her mother's old quilt, and fell asleep thinking about the look in Gage's eyes when he realized it was her.
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I hope you guys enjoyed this first addition to Fiction Friday! I think for a while I'll be continuing this story!
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Thanks for reading!
- Fallon xo
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